Don’t forget Mother’s Day is Sunday the 11th of March. Your Mam will say she doesn’t want a fuss made but we all know what she really means. To celebrate this wondrous occasion we have a look at some of the unique things that Irish Mammies do in cars.
1. Seat belt arm
Some “maniac” has pulled out in front of your Mother 200 metres up the road and she knows she has to hit the brakes… hard. Out pops the left arm across you because we all know a Mother’s arm is stronger than any modern seat belt.
2. Lots and lots of shopping bags
The government levy on plastic shopping bags is undoubtedly good for the environment but it has certainly increased the hassle of moving 50 bags out of the way every time you need to get into her car!
3. Holy paraphernalia
Holy water, holy medals, a little prayer to keep in the glove box and Padre Pio. All of these things will keep you safe on the road.
4. Jesus handle
Here’s the situation. Your Mam has asked for a lift and your are approaching a roundabout. She exclaims,”You are driving too fast!”, “Slow down will ya”. As you enter the roundabout she grabs the “Jesus” handle and proceeds to scream “Jesus, you’ll kill us all. I’m never getting in the car with you again!”
5. Using the imaginary brake pedal in the passenger seat
Very similar to the “Jesus” handle situation. Except this time she is going to make you slow down by pressing the imaginary brake pedal in the passenger seat.
6. Taking a deep breath in to squeeze through a tight space
This definitely works. Try it!
7. Tissues in the glove box
You were always glad of them when your brother’s travel sickness kicked in…
8. Teddies in the back window
Not fully sure of the reasoning behind this one? A strange form of intimidation to the drive behind maybe?
9. Disputing the laws of physics.
A fella in a “flashy” car speeds by on the motorway doing 130km/h. “Look at him speeding, he won’t get there any faster”.
10. Do not change the radio in your Mam’s car
“Who changed the radio?”, “How do I get it back to Radio 1?” Also, there will be one CD in the car, something very vanilla like “Simply Red” and that’s all she needs. No wasting time with iTunes or any of that auld rubbish!